RAISING OF SONS

In an attempt to interpret Proverbs 31, many have turned the qualities stated there to standards for women to live up to, in order to be regarded as Virtuous by the society. These standards have become stumbling blocks for a lot of women today. If a woman falls short of the standards of virtue highlighted in the text, is she then virtuous or not?

The Word of God written in the Bible is true and makes free. Romans 8:32 highlights that the knowledge of the Truth makes free, hence, any interpretation of the scripture that brings into bondage (causes people to stumble) should be reviewed because it falls short of the standard of the Truth. Would you call a woman constantly striving to attain and maintain the society’s interpretation of the supreme standards of a virtuous woman free? Is such a woman free indeed?

Thanks be to God, the giver of wisdom and revelation, as well as knowledge and understanding, who freely gives without sentiment to all those who ask of Him. Thus, as you proceed on this study, we ask the Father in the name of Jesus that the eyes of your heart be flooded with light once again, let there be insight into and better understanding of The Lord’s intention for His creations and for marriage, AMEN!

Much of the problems in homes and today's society can be attributed to the ignorance/refusal of the members of the male gender to conform to the Truth (the eternal Word of God). To the law and to the testimony: if they speak not according to this word, it is because there is no light in them. (Isaiah 8:20)

Nothing can be done against the truth but for the truth (2 Corinthians 13:18). We must therefore align with the Truth for whether we live according to the truth or not, our lives will be a testimonial to the power of the truth. If we live according to the truth, our lives will bear the sumptuous fruits that testifies of the goodness of the truth, for those who choose to live otherwise, the outcomes of their lives will serve as a deterrent for all who intend to go astray from the truth, because they will have found the vanity of the alternatives to the truth.

What then is the Truth we must align with? The Truth is the Word of God.

Today’s post will help to refocus minds on the truth that was actually stated in Proverb 31 so that every reader can truly come to know freedom.

Take a few moments to recall how certain interpretations of Proverbs 31 has been a stumbling block to some women you know, you may have wondered what a herculean task it is for a single woman to keep up with all the criteria listed and excellently perform all these responsibilities without failing at any point. This is one of the issues the book Raising of Sons by Ibidun Olude tackles. It offers an uncommon insight into the intentions of the author of Proverbs 31.

The words of King Lemuel, the oracle, which his mother taught him: What, O my son? And what, O son of my womb? And what [shall I advise you], O son of my vows?  Proverbs 31:1-2

The above makes it clear that the Words written in Proverbs 31 were teachings King Lemuel’s mother gave to him i.e. the author of Proverbs 31 is a man. Though women can benefit from the wisdom of this text, it wasn’t addressed to a woman, the words were spoken to a man. They were intended to advice/provide guidance to a beloved son (a male) about life.

Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. Proverbs 31:10 KJV

Did you notice that the text says “who can find” not “who can be a virtuous woman”? The question, “who can find a virtuous woman?”, implies that not everyone who searches is successful at finding a virtuous woman and suggests that it takes someone special to find a virtuous woman.

Can you answer the question? What kind of person can find a virtuous woman?

A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman—who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls. Proverbs 31:10 AMP

The Amplified Bible translation makes it clearer that the text places the responsibility of “finding” a virtuous woman upon the male expression of God i.e. the members of the male gender.

It should also be noted that the term 'find' as mentioned in Proverbs 31 is not limited to locating or discovering the virtuous woman, it also speaks of unearthing, uncovering, bringing to light, mining, refining, grooming and inventing such woman. The inquiry is about a man that can make the investment required to bring out the great qualities described in the woman he has discovered. This debunks the need for a woman’s perfection at the onset and presents instead the fact that a man should be ready to cultivate the woman of his choice. This is what we regard as making room for a woman’s virtues to flourish, a great man ought to be a Room Maker for the women in his life.

So, what kind of man is he who is a Room Maker?

Proverbs 31:10 also highlights why a man should do this, why he should embark on such costly voyage; it says the value of a virtuous woman surpasses that of gemstones, she is a kind of treasure that is worth much more than jewels.

Proverbs 18:22 (CEVUK) says “A man’s greatest treasure is his wife- she is a gift from the Lord”. The King James Version puts it this way “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.”  i.e. Anyone who finds a wife has found a good thing-a gift from God and obtains favour of The Lord. It appears that a woman (wife) is a treasure of inestimable value that takes the Proverbs 31 man to explore. A man has to mine and refine this gift from God to behold and enjoy the pleasure she bestows

The question then is who has the capability to pay the price that is required to draw out the hidden treasure/virtues in a woman?

A virtuous woman is not found just because a man proposed marriage to her but because her Room Maker, (who is a Proverbs 31 man) is making room for her to become all that the Creator designed and planned for her to be.

This looks like serious work for the man - a strategic assignment that must be based on divine revelation of the woman’s divine destiny as well as the man’s role in getting her there, i.e. a wise man does not sit back waiting for the virtuous woman to be handed to him, rather, he rolls up his sleeves and works towards unravelling the virtues in his woman. How does he do this?

It's not by power, nor by might but by My Spirit says The Lord. The task is accomplished by the Spirit of the Lord. It takes a man of the Spirit to invent a virtuous woman.

Does this mean wise women no longer build homes? Or women have no contribution to building godly homes? Not so! Women have very crucial roles to play and this will be discussed in subsequent posts, so please stay tuned.

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Pro.31:10 (CEVUK) “A truly good wife is the most precious treasure a man can find!”